Decision-making : A short summary of how I became more decisive

Decision Making

I still haven’t figured out everything that entails making a perfect decision, but from what I’ve learned and experienced in life, I’ve realized that there is no such thing as a perfect decision. There are only decisions that are better or worse for you, each containing positives and negatives.

For example, the decision to stay up late to finish your homework to avoid getting in trouble tomorrow brings the following positives:

  • Not being in trouble for not completing your homework
  • Finishing it on time

However, there are negatives as well:

  • A lack of sleep resulting in worse overall performance

Like the example above, all decisions have positives and negatives. Let’s further classify them:

Negatives of decisions:

  • These result in you not being able to do something, either now or in the long run, because of the decision you undertook. For instance, choosing not to have sex before marriage (a decision I made due to religious beliefs) means refraining from the act of sex, even if you really want to do it. The reasons for not doing it outweigh the reasons for doing it, and therefore you choose not to allow yourself to engage in it.

Positives of decisions:

  • These are the reasons you choose a particular decision over another.
  • Feelings, thoughts, and facts play a big part in why these reasons are considered better.
  • Using the example of not having sex, the positives I receive include having a clear conscience, avoiding unplanned pregnancies, and adhering to religious and scientific reasons (such as stronger pair bonding with my future spouse) that benefit me.

This is an overall view of what a decision is. Now let’s delve into the heart of decision making.

For a long period of time, I was extremely indecisive. I believed that a decision needed to be perfect, and if I didn’t make the right decision, everything would crumble. I feared becoming a living dead, toiling away at work and failing, flunking, or giving up on life. However, more recently, perhaps in the last four months, I’ve come to realize that a decision is not the be-all and end-all of everything. It is just the beginning of a journey, the first step towards a thousand-mile destination. Even if a decision seems horrible in retrospect, you can work on it and transform it into a decision you would want to make.

In the process of decision making, start by weighing the positives and negatives of the decisions you face. You can list them out on a piece of paper and evaluate which negatives or positives you cannot or won’t live without. Then, tally up which option has more positives, and on paper, it would be the best decision for you. Next, I would recommend mulling it over in your head for a day, imagining different scenarios for each option, and finalizing the decision the following day. This approach is particularly useful for significant decisions.

This is a quick post, I’m thinking of posting a more in-depth article on decision making in the future. I hope you enjoyed this article.


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